Keyboard Immortal

Chapter 205: It’s Hard to Cure Brain Damage

Translator: Pika

Mi Li was rendered speechless. Why does this fellow not operate like a normal human being?

You have successfully trolled Mi Li for +250 Rage!

“You fellow...” Mi Li gritted her teeth angrily, but before she could go on a rampage, Zu An suddenly raised his hand to stop her.

“Hold on for a moment.”

“What do you want?” asked Mi Li with a frown, not knowing what he was up to.

Zu An summoned his Keyboard and began drawing his lottery once more.

He had already lost over 30,000 Rage points in the previous lottery, so there was no way he was going to let history repeat itself. Thus, he decided to use up his Rage points right away!

He was left with 84 Rage points previously, so with Mi Li’s new contribution of 250, the sum had added up to a total of 334 Rage points, which meant that he could draw three more times.

At this moment, he even felt that he was making a profit here.

Just as he had expected, he got nothing from the three draws at all. However, his feelings were very different from before. He felt far more relaxed now that he had finally gotten rid of the flag weighing him down.

I really mustn’t make vows casually in the future. Karma is a bitch.

“Alright, I’m back. Big sis empress, what were you saying earlier on?” Zu An was in such a good mood that a smile lingered on his lips.

“I was going to say earlier that...” Mi Li was halfway into her words when she suddenly froze up. Huh, what was I going to say earlier? The earlier disruption had thrown her off her tempo.

It took a long moment before she finally recalled what she was getting to. “Hmph, don’t you know better than anyone else why I’m sealing this Life-and-Death Contract with you? It maddens me just to think about it! If you dare bring this matter up to make light of me in the future, I won’t let you off the hook easily.”

There was a slight moment of pause as Mi Li wondered if her threat was far too vague to be taken seriously, so she supplemented, “I might be unable to kill you, but I can easily break your limbs. You need to be beaten up in order to raise your cultivation anyway, so I’m actually doing you a favor here. Hmm, now that I’m thinking about it, I’m really tempted to give it a try.”

Noticing how Mi Li’s eyes were glancing toward his limbs, Zu An recoiled in horror. He quickly replied, “T-there’s no need to give it a try! I trust your words, I really do! Ah right, I have a question for you. If Ying Zheng knows a mean to deal with you, why didn’t he simply purify you back then instead of creating such a complicated seal?”

“The purification of the Primordial Origin Sutra only works on souls. I was protected by my body back then, so why would I fear his purification?” Mi Li harrumphed.

Zu An was perplexed. “But he could have killed you and purified your soul right after, no? Pardon my frankness, but you should be weaker than Ying Zheng, right? Surely he should have some ways to kill you, right?”

Mi Li had been vague about this matter thus far, but perhaps due to their fates being linked together now, she chose to elaborate deeper into the matter this time around. “He’s a headstrong person. He wanted me to submit to me, but how could I let him get his way? That being said, I do acknowledge that he probably spared me on the account of our couple ties... It was shortly after our fight that Ying Zheng suddenly dropped dead, so I ended up getting stuck in my seal.”

Zu An noticed a peculiarity in Mi Li’s expression when she made those remarks, as if she was reminiscing the past. For some reason, he had a feeling that the latter was intentionally hiding something from him.

He knew that further probing wouldn’t make Mi Li reveal any information she didn’t want to, so he decided to put the matter aside for now and only ask about it after they got closer to one another.

“You mentioned that Zhang Han used the lingering aura of the Soul Suppression Seal to seal off the 200,000 evil spirits together with Xiang Yu. Since Xiang Yu came to this mausoleum, considering the hatred he bore toward the imperial family, it didn’t make sense for him to spare you,” asked Zu An.

“You surprisingly know quite a bit about Xiang Yu.” Mi Li was surprised. “Indeed, Xiang Yu has harbor great hatred for the Qin Dynasty. He killed the Qin soldiers who surrendered back then, burned down the palaces, and plundered Xianyang[1] as he pleased. When he learned about my existence from Zhang Han, he wanted to lay his hands on me too.”

There was a hint of fury in Mi Li’s voice as he spoke. “He has long heard of my beauty, and my identity as the empress of the Qin Dynasty also stoked his desire to conquer. He began bearing filthy thoughts about me. He started off by expressing his admiration for me in the underground palace, and eventually, he succumbed to his lust and tried to undo the Soul Suppression Seal.”

Zu An was alarmed. “Given Xiang Yu’s strength, even the Soul Suppression Soul shouldn’t be able to stop him, right?”

In his previous world, Xiang Yu was known to be a powerful general renowned for his martial prowess. In this world of supernatural abilities, wouldn’t Xiang Yu be a terrifyingly powerful cultivator then?

“You’re mistaken about that. Xiang Yu is indeed an extremely powerful individual; the Human Seal and Earth Seal couldn’t stop him at all. He was able to overcome the trials far faster than you did,” replied Mi Li.

Zu An scratched his head sheepishly. I mean, it’s nothing much to lose to a legendary historical figure, right?

“However, he failed at the Heaven Seal. No matter how powerful he was, he was unable to stand against heaven’s will. On top of that, he seems to have met with some trouble outside, so he ended up never returning to this mausoleum. It’s for that reason that I thought that the Heaven Seal is fraught with dangers. If even someone as powerful as Xiang Yu wasn’t able to breach it, I can’t say that I bear any hopes for a third rank cultivator like you. Yet, you actually managed to succeed at where he failed. Perhaps it’s heaven’s will at play here,” remarked Mi Li wistfully before she chuckled softly.

But she suddenly remembered how she had been shackled into yet another cage shortly after being released, and her complexion turned awful once more.

“Looks like I’m the one chosen by heaven,” remarked Zu An gleefully.

His glee only further spurred Mi Li’s displeasure. “Hmph! If not for the Tai’e Sword suffering great damage from Xiang Yu’s attempt to breach the seal back then, it would have surely been far more difficult for you.”

Zu An didn’t think that it was a big deal at all. “The fact how everything worked out despite the odds stacked against me shows that it’s the work of fate at play here. Don’t you find it interesting how a third rank cultivator like me was able to accomplish what the powerful Xiang Yu is unable to pull off?”

Mi Li was slightly surprised to hear those words. She murmured under her breath, “Fate, huh...”

It took her a long while before she snapped out of it and said, “You have been asking me questions for some time now. It’s time for you to answer my questions now.”

“Big sis empress, feel free to ask anything of me. I’ll answer your doubts to the best of my abilities!” replied Zu An with a smile.

For some reason, Mi Li had a feeling that Zu An was going to concoct lies. “Where did you obtain the Phoenix Nirvana Sutra from?”

“Well, I received it from a mysterious old man...” Since he was bound to Mi Li in a Life-and-Death Contract now, there was no reason for him to hide this from her. She was bound to find out once they returned to the Chu Manor anyway.

Besides, Old Mi had always given him a sinister feeling, so it might be good for him to discuss this matter with Mi Li.

Mi Li frowned. “Is he your father or your grandfather?”

“...” Zu An.

Why do I feel like I’m being scolded here?

“Neither.”

“If he’s unrelated to you, why would he present such a powerful secret art to you? It’s as clear as day that he’s up to something,” sneered Mi Li.

Zu An shared the same thoughts too, but he simply couldn’t figure just what he had that Old Mi coveted.

“Is it my looks? Y’know, I have a strong feeling that I’m the one chosen by heaven, the protagonist of the world. I feel that it’s only normal for powerful experts to want to impart all of their skills to me.”

“...” Mi Li.

She eyed Zu An with narrowed eyes for a moment before asking, “By any chance, are you deranged?”

“???” Zu An.

You’re the one who is deranged. Your entire family is deranged!

“If there’s something wrong with your head, you ought to tell me right away. I might be a runemaster, but I am fairly well-versed in medicine too. I might just be able to treat your illness before it gets too severe. It’s common knowledge amongst physicians that those with mental problems tend to be the hardest to treat,” remarked Mi Li.

“...” Zu An.

However, he suddenly noticed something and asked, “Wait a moment, you’re a physician too?”

“Of course!” replied Mi Li proudly. “Back then, the Qin Dynasty conquered the whole Central Plains and gathered the collection of books from all annexed countries into its imperial palace. I would browse through those books whenever I had time. Eventually, I managed to converge my knowledge of runes and medicine together to create a new path for myself. You can say that I’m still decent in the field of medicine.”

Even though Mi Li said that she was only ‘decent’, there was an incredibly proud look on her face that screamed ‘praise me, worship me’.

“Since you’re a physician, you should hurry up and treat Snow!” Zu An was overjoyed. Mi Li was turning out to be a far greater treasure than he had expected.

Mi Li’s face immediately turned cold. “I don’t have any medicinal herb or pills on me. How do you expect me to save me?”

“Tsk, looks like you aren’t as formidable as I thought.” Zu An clicked his tongue.

“You need not try to rile me up,” replied Mi Li. “I can treat her if the situation really necessitates it, but I’m in far too much of a weakened state at the moment. It wasn’t easy for me to heal up a little through those evil spirits, so why should I expend myself for a woman I owe nothing to? Besides, she isn’t in mortal danger. All she needs to do is to consume some vitality restoring herbs or pills, and she’ll be able to easily make a full recovery.”

Zu An also realized that he had failed to assess the situation properly due to his worry, but still, he wasn’t about to lose this quip. “I still think that your skills as a physician aren’t anything much. Otherwise, how could you get done in by poison so easily?”

Mi Li really lost her temper this time around. “Ignorant brat, what do you know? The Red Tears of Lady Xiang is not something that should exist in the mortal world. It’s something that can kill even an Earth Immortal! If not for my knowledge of runes and medicine allowing me to draw my soul out of my body, I would have died by now!”

You have successfully trolled Mi Li for +512 Rage!

Zu An was astounded. He didn’t think that the poison was so potent. It was just a pity that Zhang Han had used up the final droplet, or else he would be able to easily eliminate anyone with that poison in hand.

Mi Li felt that she would get a heart attack soon if she continued speaking to Zu An, so she decided to ignore him altogether. She turned to the terracotta soldiers and said, “You’ve worked hard. If not for you all fighting valiantly to buy us time, we wouldn’t have been able to bring down those evil spirits so easily.”

The terracotta soldiers were touched to hear those words. They had guarded this underground hall for over a thousand years now, and they were finally being recognized for their efforts. This was something incredibly honorable to them.

“Now that Zhang Han is dead and the Qin Dynasty has fallen, you’ll serve me from now onward,” said Mi Li as she gazed down at the terracotta soldiers with an air of loftiness.

Those terracotta soldiers looked at one another hesitantly for a moment before hurriedly getting to their knees to bow to her. This was a gesture of servility in the Qin Dynasty.

Zu An was delighted to see this.

Wouldn’t I be able to do as I please with this? I’ll get Mi Li to send those terracotta soldiers against anyone who dares to cross me! Ahhh, it looks like I’m born to be a moochlord!

While he was deep in his thoughts, an unexpected situation suddenly occurred. Murderous intent flashed across Mi Li’s eyes as she raised her hand, and the Tai’e Sword suddenly swept through the terracotta soldiers with immense momentum.

Those unguarded terracotta soldiers were sliced into halves in an instant!

1. The capital of the Qin Dynasty.