I’m an Infinite Regressor, But I’ve Got Stories to Tell

Chapter 191

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The Patriot IV

Jo Yeong-su's great cross-country journey! From Busan to Pyongyang! Behold the man who intends to shock everyone with his boldness!

Although no such advertisement appeared, I imagined the impact he aimed to create was immense indeed. By conducting surveys among both Awakeners and the general populace, he aimed to gather the "opinion of the entire Korean Peninsula." What audacious ambition!

And so, Jo Yeong-su's ambitious project culminated with...

[Jo Yeong-su died in Yecheon.]

He didn't even make it past Gyeongsangbuk-do, let alone reach Pyongyang. His journey left him stranded.

[What?]

"Nothing, just talking to myself. So, what was the cause of death?"

[Ah, he got lost in the Void. You know, sometimes when you walk near the Nakdong River, you inadvertently enter a Void known as the Hwangsan River.]

Originally a name from the Silla era for the Nakdong River meaning “yellow mountain”, the Hwangsan River was reinterpreted by creatures from being the river springing from the yellow mountain to a river of yellow springs in the form of sulfuric acid (H₂SO₄), turning the entire body of water into a biochemical terror. One simple misstep could send you directly to the yellow springs of the underworld, hence caution was required.

[He wandered there for three days, built a raft, and tried to cross, but only managed a few meters before the raft disintegrated, taking him with it.]

"Is this for real?"

Regardless, Jo Yeong-su was dead. To put it crudely, it was a miserable death.

And when the citizenry heard of Jo Yeong-su's obituary, they weren't particularly shocked or upset. Quite the opposite, actually.

"Did you hear? That crazy guy died. The one who always protested at the Tower of Babel Plaza."

"Eh? How did he die?"

"He set off to travel the country by himself."

"Ah, he must not have had much left to cling to in life."

The citizens briefly mourned and then promptly returned to their daily struggles.

In essence, Jo Yeong-su's death didn't make many waves in the news. Considering that he had spent his life making news in Busan, it was somewhat ironic. Why Jo Yeong-su suddenly became obsessed with conducting a nationwide survey, and what his objectives were, would now forever remain a mystery.

"Hmm."

If there were no regressors in this world...

"I'm a bit concerned."

[About what?]

"Saintess, you had a lot of interest in Jo Yeong-su. Yet, you just watched him wander the void for three days?"

[Professional and personal matters must be kept separate,] the Saintess replied calmly. [While I had a personal interest in Mr. Jo Yeong-su's activities, I could not use the powers of my office to assist him.]

"Really? Was it not you who prompted me to take an interest in Jo Yeong-su?"

[......]

"If so, then you succeeded, Saintess. Now, I am also curious about him."

What had Jo Yeong-su hoped to achieve by risking his life?

I found myself a bit curious. And once I am curious, like a certain elven mage diving headfirst into a mimic chest, I am a willing slave to dopamine.[1]

Thus, in the next cycle, I immediately changed how I approached Jo Yeong-su.

"Sir, I’ll set you down here and leave."

"Ugh... ugh..."

The event at the pojangmacha in Haeundae, where we spent all night drinking, unfolded the same as before. The 91st public opinion survey that asked anew about the demise of the Republic of Korea also occurred in the same way. The turning point in Jo Yeong-su's route came after.

"Mr. Jo!"

"Uh? Isn't that Mr. Undertaker?!"

On the day he left Busan for Changwon, I personally went to see him off.

"What brings you here, Mr. Undertaker?"

"There's a caravan going to Changwon today. I have some business up in Mokpo and thought I'd travel along."

"Is that so!" Jo Yeong-su's eyes widened. "Mr. Undertaker! I have a favor to ask of you!"

"A favor?"

"Yes! No matter what, I must continue the survey in Changwon, but the members of the National Road Management Corps here are dead set against it! How can an institution funded by taxpayers be so miserly?!"

It was natural. Why would a caravan, already busy transporting goods, want to add to its burden? In the past cycle, he probably forced his way into the caravan amid chaos.

"Is that so?"

But this time, the psycho-social genius Mr. Undertaker, revered as 'His Excellency' by his connections, was here.

"Look here, gentlemen,” I implored. “Mr. Jo Yeong-su and I have been drinking together, can't you overlook this just once?"

"Of course!"

"If he's a friend of Mr. Undertaker's, we must treat him as a VIP! Sorry for the cold shoulder earlier!"

"Thank you, gentlemen. I'll treat you to coffee next time I see your faces. Oh, but I'm worried that other members might not be aware of our relationship..."

"Don't worry, Your Excellency!"

"We'll post about it on SG Net so all members are informed!"

I snuck a glance behind me. Jo Yeong-su's mouth was hanging open in shock.

Aha, do you see? This is the ‘power of the protagonist.’ Despite its frequent appearance in other novels, here, it is doled out sparingly, like an oasis in the desert.

Without even lifting a finger, Jo Yeong-su had snagged a free ticket to travel across the Korean Peninsula, but my power didn't stop there.

"If you are to conduct surveys everywhere, including the places the caravan doesn't reach, you should use this."

"Uh, Mr. Undertaker, what is this?"

"A yogurt cart."

A South Korean staple. The third-generation refrigerated electric cart, CoCo (Cold&Cold). Within its limited range of 'the territory of the Republic of Korea,' it could move and appear anywhere. Now, Jo Yeong-su was practically as mobile as Guan Yu with his Red Hare.[2]

"Thank you, Mr. Undertaker. I wonder if I'll ever be able to repay this kindness before I die..." As someone who had to scrounge a daily living, Jo Yeong-su was overwhelmed by the sudden, generous donation.

I grinned broadly. "I've always been interested in your surveys, Mr. Jo. Don't think of this as a personal gift, but as support for your cause."

"Mr. Undertaker...!"

Relationship enhancement complete.

On the road parting from Jo Yeong-su in Changwon, the Saintess commented, [I didn’t expect this. I thought you had no interest in Korea or public opinion surveys, Mr. Undertaker.]

"Originally, I didn't. But someone kept subtly suggesting I take a look at this man."

The Saintess paused in palpable confusion. [You have someone like that in your circle, Mr. Undertaker? I didn't see anyone with my Clairvoyance.]

"I have my privacy too. Anyway, please keep an eye on him, Saintess. If he gets lost in the Void or something, help him out."

[Ah, yes. I understand.]

Naturally, the Regressor Alliance Network buzzed with the news that “Mr. Undertaker has taken an interest in the crazy guy from the Tower of Babel Plaza.”

Sim Ah-ryeon, reigning as a Saintess of the North, appeared through the Inunaki Tunnel one day and peeked out.

"Y-yes. The monster of camaraderie..."

"...?"

"You pretend not to, but actually, guild leader, you wanted to fit in with SG Net's top brass, right? That's why you keep clinging to me and the old man..."

"...?"

"I'll acknowledge you during the dead-of-night shift. So please don't leave comments in the morning, noon, or evening. Using real-life connections to invade the community's camaraderie... Such an outrage, I absolutely cannot forgive..."

"...?"

Leaving just her words behind, Sim Ah-ryeon quickly walked away.

What was that about? At times, I feared her mental world.

At any rate, though unfortunate, Sim Ah-ryeon was the Saintess of the North. She granted Jo Yeong-su the status of a monk in the Holy Eastern State, allowing him to travel freely even in North Korean areas.

Effectively, most powers controlling the Korean Peninsula—from the frontend to the backend—were now sponsoring Jo Yeong-su individually.

'It seems that heroes and saintesses are obsessing over me, a mere low-tier streamer?!' Powered by such light novel-like developments, Jo Yeong-su ransacked the entire eight provinces of the country.

Time passed.

2,211 days.

From Busan to Sinuiju.

From the south to the north of the still surviving Korean Peninsula.

That was the time it took to complete a single public opinion survey.

[We're just coming down from Sinuiju after finishing the last survey there. Now...]

"Are you returning to Busan?"

[Probably.]

While the survey was running in those six years or so, I hadn't once asked the Saintess about the results. My interest was solely in Jo Yeong-su as an individual, not in what people thought about the demise of the Republic of Korea.

What had Jo Yeong-su hoped to achieve through his six-year journey? Was it the certainty that the nation still existed in people's hearts? The driving force to continue the revival movement for the Republic of Korea?

[Ah, it seems he has a different destination in mind. Jo Yeong-su has found a ship in Pyongyang, but it's not heading to Busan.]

Neither option was the correct answer.

[He's heading to Seoul.]

Seoul was practically my backyard.

In a panic but pretending not to care, I hurried to the wharf and started fishing. Jo Yeong-su, coming by boat from Pyongyang, would have no choice but to spot me as soon as he disembarked.

There, he exclaimed in surprise, "Mr. Undertaker! What are you doing here?!"

"Oh, Mr. Jo?"

Jo Yeong-su abandoned his yogurt cart and rushed to embrace me.

A reunion six years in the making. The scents of lush grass and arid sunlight wafted from Jo Yeong-su.

"My goodness! Mr. Undertaker, you look the same even after so many years!"

"Haha, your voice is still as hearty as ever, Mr. Jo."

"A man of the Han empire must possess spirit, mustn't he? What have you been up to here?"

"I've been enjoying fishing. My Seoul hideout is nearby."

"Huh! Fishing in such times..." Jo Yeong-su's eyes deepened with respect and affection as he looked at me. He had aged significantly more than before. Depending on who was looking, he might be mistaken for someone in his late eighties after traveling across the country with the body of a frail Awakener. Even with fiery donations, it hadn't been easy.

"And what brings you to the Han River, Mr. Jo?"

"Ah! Thanks to your support, I've finally completed the survey!" Jo Yeong-su patted the cart with a thump. "I'm planning to take this guy to his final resting place!"

"Final resting place?"

"Yes! To the place where those who ruined the country gather!" Jo Yeong-su said, pointing with his finger. In that direction lay Yeouido, and on Yeouido stood a dome building well-known to anyone from the Republic of Korea.

It was the National Assembly Building.

"Uh..." I hastily picked up the thread of conversation. "Mr. Jo, that might look like the National Assembly Building, but it's actually a Void. Originally, when the Void of perpetual night came to Seoul, it wiped out everything like other buildings, reducing them to ruins. Then, one day, that building just appeared on its own. There's even a real robot underground there."

"Eh? I don't really know about that stuff! But I must go there anyway!"

Thinking back, this man, who in the last cycle had embarked on a nationwide tour bare-bodied and enjoyed free-diving in the Hwangsan River, wouldn't heed a conventional warning like “It's a Void, so it's dangerous.” Normally, such a person would have died, but in this cycle, I'd resuscitated him with emergency CPR.

"Then I will accompany you."

"Oh my! I'm sorry to trouble you..."

"No worries, no worries. I was just passing the time fishing, anyway."

"Oh! I can't thank you enough, Mr. Undertaker! How did I end up in your debt in both the beginning and the end?"

It wasn't long before we reached the ferry terminal to the National Assembly Building, about 30 minutes even at the leisurely pace of Jo Yeong-su's cart.

During those 30 minutes, we chatted about various things. Which neighborhood was the toughest in the survey? Were there any close calls with death?

The conversation gradually went back in time. In the days when civilization was intact, he had been the editor-in-chief of a small regional newspaper.

"My family name is Pungyang Jo!"

The timeline of the conversation swiftly reached Jo Yeong-su's childhood.

"As you know, Mr. Undertaker, our ancestors, the Jo family from Pungyang, did a lot to ruin Joseon with their politics! Well, some historians argue it wasn't entirely their fault!"

I nodded. The Pungyang Jo family was well-known. Along with the Andong Kim family, they were among the 'surnames that inevitably make one restless during history classes.' Though both were mere commoners compared to the Yeohung Min family, Jo Yeong-su continued his story.

"Ha! When I read the textbooks as a child, I was shocked!"

"Is that so?"

"Yes! As a child, I resolved not to let my family be blamed for ruining the country! How could my family be called the surname of a ruined nation?"

Jo Yeong-su made a fist in the air as if grasping something.

"Just you watch! When I grow up, I'll become a scholar as loyal as Choi Ik-hyeon, doing what my ancestors failed to do![3] No one in my family said a word, but a wild little kid was making a fuss all by himself."

Heh heh. Laughter erupted from Jo Yeong-su's aged lips.

"So, my fundamental feelings about the country were rooted in the shame of my youth and an inferiority complex. It's not something I'd go around bragging about."

As we entered the National Assembly Building, as predicted, creatures attacked us. There were no formidable boss-level creatures, but plenty of town-level creatures swarmed us.

If I hadn't been accompanying him, Jo Yeong-su's life would have ended there.

'How many times is this fellow going to dodge death?'

With a bitter smile, I managed to somehow escort Jo Yeong-su to the main hall of the National Assembly Building.

"Ah!" Jo Yeong-su looked around and declared, "Nothing has changed since the old days! Well, back then, the members of the assembly filled about half the seats."

"Hmm."

"The country has fallen apart, but this place alone looks just fine. Heh! It's not much different from the old days."

I didn't meet his statement with a response. It wasn't really a conversation aimed at me but, instead, more like a monologue.

Jo Yeong-su walked around the main assembly hall with his hands clasped behind his back. He peered at the nameplates on the desks, muttering, "Ah! Right, he was a representative!"

Had this empty hall once condensed the hopes and cheers, aspirations and wishes, contempt, anger, mockery, and hostility of the people of the Korean Peninsula?

Thump. Thump.

Jo Yeong-su placed a piece of paper on each desk. I enhanced my vision to sneak a peek at the contents.

Republic of Korea's Ninety-First Public Opinion Survey

Question: Do you think the nation of Korea has collapsed?

① Yes.

② No.

After distributing the tattered documents to all the seats, Jo Yeong-su walked up to the speaker's podium.

His gaze was fixed somewhere in the air, as if he were looking not at the present but at the past.

"Please adjust the seats."

Jo Yeong-su's voice was soft. Without a microphone, it was hard to discern any authority in his tone. Just the voice of an ordinary man who had aged to his late eighties from traveling the country.

"As there is a quorum, I will call this plenary session to order."

Clack, clack, clack.

A wooden gavel struck the air three times. Between the strikes, Jo Yeong-su coughed.

"In the absence of the speaker, I, Jo Yeong-su, will preside over this meeting. There are 33 individuals across the country who consider themselves citizens of the Republic of Korea, and all have delegated me the authority to conduct this assembly."

"......"

"Respected members of the assembly and fellow citizens, as the acting deputy speaker, I will report on the progress before moving on to the next agenda item."

Flutter.

Jo Yeong-su turned a page of the survey.

"First, Busan. In response to the question 'Has the Republic of Korea perished?', about 86% of the eligible voters responded. Out of 235,695 respondents, 235,693 chose option one, 'It has perished.'"

The paper turned again.

"Next, Changwon. In response to the same question, about 91% of eligible voters responded. All 54,980 respondents chose option one, 'It has perished.'"

The papers flipped one page at a time. As the tattered pages fluttered, the locations called out moved gradually from the south to the north of the peninsula.

"Lastly, Sinuiju. In response to the question, about 89% of eligible voters responded. All 21,139 respondents chose option one, 'It has perished.'"

It took less than six minutes to announce the results of six years of public opinion surveys.

Jo Yeong-su closed the last page of the survey.

"This survey was conducted among citizens aged five and older. Considering the special nature of the matter, not only adults over 18 but also children aged five and above were considered eligible voters. The future of the country was at stake."

Cough.

Jo Yeong-su's coughing became more frequent. He paused for breath between coughs and spoke very deliberately.

"An opinion survey is just that, an opinion survey. However, in the current situation where no voting takes place, I, the acting chair, believe it serves the function of a vote. To support this, I have been delegated the rights by 33 citizens who chose option two, 'It has not perished.'"

Cough, cough.

"Thus, I, the acting chair, will put the existence of the Republic of Korea to a vote. Since the voting results have already been announced, I will proceed with the decision. If anyone objects, please speak now."

Cough, cough.

"Has everyone voted? I will now close the voting. I will announce the results. About 88% of all eligible voters participated, with 3,125,678 for option one, 'It has perished,' making up more than 99.99% of the total population. Option two, 'It has not perished,' received 33 votes, less than 0.01%."

Cough, cough.

"Therefore, I declare the Republic of Korea has perished."

Clack, clack, clack.

The gavel sounded.

At that moment, something strange happened.

From the empty parliamentary seats, irrespective of party lines, applause erupted. The clapping also came from the deserted galleries. Between claps, the noise of camera flashes could be heard.

Clap, clap, clap, clap, clap, clap, clap!

Even more peculiar was that this sound seemed audible only to me. Jo Yeong-su showed no reaction whatsoever. He simply sat quietly in the speaker's chair, eyes closed.

"......"

Looking at his peaceful face, a thought struck me.

Perhaps, like individuals, nations also require funerals when they die. Perhaps this old man had borne the funeral rites alone for six years, unaided by anyone else.

If so, at this moment, the nation known as the Republic of Korea had died and been laid in its coffin.

After that day, Jo Yeong-su never again took to the Tower of Babel Plaza to stage his protest, shouting, “Dictator Noh Do-hwa! Step down!”

Jo Yeong-su lived out his days as an ordinary old man, frequenting free meal centers and labor markets, and died not long after. Having already spent all his energy traveling the country, he was of an age where his vitality had waned.

WIth his having no relatives, I took it upon myself to be his chief mourner. I set up a modest wake in his makeshift shack. There weren’t many mourners who joined me. At most, a few old men with whom Jo Yeong-su had passed time playing Go visited.

Then, on the last night, Noh Do-hwa came by unexpectedly without any attendants. Looking around the almost tent-like shabby shack, she muttered, "Isn't there even beef soup here...?"

"How could we afford such an expensive thing?"

"Aren't you filthy rich...?"

"Ah, it's not about money but about conducting the funeral with heart. If we held a grand funeral now, all sorts of riffraff would flock here, but would that have been in accordance with the deceased's wishes?"

"Hmm..."

That was the first exchange upon her arrival. After paying her respects to the portrait (she didn't bow to me as the chief mourner), Noh Do-hwa plunked down beside me.

"Why did that old man go from his incessant, noisy protesting to suddenly giving up and kicking the bucket?"

"After finishing the survey, he went to the National Assembly Building in Yeouido and declared that the Republic of Korea had perished."

"Huh? Ahh? Ahh..." Noh Do-hwa stroked her chin. "What about the body?"

"He was the last representative of a ruined nation. It would be strange if the creatures didn't covet him. I'm planning to cremate him and scatter his ashes in the sea."

And so it was done.

Creatures were as dangerous to the dead as they were to the living. Without stringent procedures, 'Funeral Etiquette: Do Not Startle the Mourners by Suddenly Reviving!' was likely to be violated.

After scattering his ashes in the sea, we simply erected a modest tombstone at the site. This type of burial was called a sea tomb.

"Having the great Undertaker supervise the funeral from start to finish. This, indeed, is a good death..." Noh Do-hwa snipped sarcastically to the end.

The tall tombstone of the sea tomb was carved with the following inscription:

Jo Yeong-su

趙泳洙

Citizen of the Republic of Korea

大韓民國 國民

Noh Do-hwa shrugged. "I've been up all night since yesterday and I'm getting hungry..."

"Shall we go for beef soup?"

"Oh, beef soup sounds good..."

There's no further content in this story.

In some ways, this entire episode was an epilogue to the nation known as Korea.

Footnotes:

[1] A reference to Frieren, an immortal, elven mage who dives headfirst into every chest—easily detectable mimic or no—on the off-chance she finds a grimoire within that she hasn’t read yet.

[2] In Romance of the Three Kingdoms, the Red Hare is a horse capable of crossing 1,000 ri (approximately 333.33 miles) in a day. It eventually was gifted to the general Guan Yu.

[3] Choi Ik-hyeon was a Korean Joseon Dynasty scholar and politician who was a staunch advocate for Korean independence in the face of Japanese imperialism.

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