Bleach: Starting as a Vasto Lorde

Chapter 148: What a Teaser

The moment Kazuya's eyes fluttered open, his vision was filled by the upside-down face of Yoruichi, her feline face inches from his own. She patted her fluffy paws against his face, as if pinching his cheeks.

“Kazuya, lad, here’s your good morning greeting,” she purred, her feminine voice sultry yet playful. “Few have the honor of getting this luxurious treatment from me.”

“I’m flattered.” He picked her up before placing her on the bed. “Do you want me to groom your fur?”

His hand hovered before her, as if asking for consent to caress her. A fleeting look of puzzlement crossed her face. She had grown so accustomed to his spontaneous chin rubs that his respectful approach felt out of place. Nevertheless, she kept her feelings under wraps and continued as if nothing were out of the ordinary.

“Harribel cleaned me yesterday with shampoo, which was unnecessary. A little Reiatsu is all I need for my grooming needs.”

During his time in Hueco Mundo, he had relied on Reiatsu for cleansing, but it never provided the same satisfying sensation as water. “Anyway, I’m planning to test my new Zanpakutō abilities. Wanna tag along?”

Her golden eyes lit up, reflecting her excitement. “Heck yeah. Your Zanpakutō has piqued my interest since day one. I’m curious what type of absurd power you will manifest.”

“I got a condition, though.”

Her tail flicked skyward, its tip twitching. “Conditions again… Very well, state them.”

“You'll come with me in your Shinigami form to help test my Zanpakutō.”

“That, I can do.”

With a fluid grace that only she possessed, Yoruichi leapt off the bed and transformed into her human form. Retrieving an orange ribbon from his drawer, she quickly tied her violet locks into a ponytail. In one swift motion, she pivoted on her heel and bent down low onto her hands and feet, taking up a stretch that would test the limits of her flexibility and balance.

Her legs were spread wide, the closest one stretching forward and the back one reaching back, her toe barely grazing the ground. Her hands, with fingers splayed, grounded her chest parallel to the floor. As she held her stance, every muscle in her body tensed powerfully, from the swell of her deltoids to the defined ridges of her calf muscles. Her athletic form was even more impressive than Sung-Sun, despite the fact Yoruichi hadn’t trained for almost a century.

In her stretching position, her puffy vulva and tiny butthole were entirely exposed. But it didn’t bother her as she felt no shame in being fully undressed before him.

“Hngh, it’s so satisfying to do it every time I transform back.”

{Beloved, we can’t let her get away with it!}

In response to Nami's words, he shook his head, his brows furrowing. The more he indulged Yoruichi’s playful teasing, the less she regarded him with any seriousness. When it came to someone like Yoruichi, the best approach was either overpowering them through brute force or dismissing their teasing without a reaction. He took the latter approach since he found the idea of forcing himself on women plain disgusting.

Yoruichi shifted her weight, sending a ripple of muscle through her abdomen. As he had expected, she covertly glanced at him from the corner of her eyes, trying to assess his reaction. In the face of his indifference, a disappointed sigh escaped her, and she quickly got back up. The whole point of doing the nude stretches was to capture his interest and get some usual playful remarks. She failed miserably in her task.

‘He’s not upset with me, then it means…’

The way he barely acknowledged her presence, with a distant and detached look in his eyes, pointed towards his waning interest in her. His indifference was entirely justified as she had witnessed him charm many stunning women that she felt uncertain about holding his gaze with her body.

‘Well, it’s better this way. I’m not cut out for this shit.’

Despite her efforts to reassure herself, she couldn’t shake the conflicting emotions of pride and melancholy that swelled in her chest. She approached Kazuya's closet, her hand gripping the doorknob before she swung it open. “You have a closet full of clothes when you don’t even live here.”

“Sung-Sun arranged everything. She is a bit of a fashion deviant.”

“She is fulfilling the duties of a good housewife,” Yoruichi muttered and slammed the closet shut. “None of them will fit me.”

“You can ask Sung-Sun. You both are of the same height, give or take a few centimeters.”

“I guess I have no other choice.”

While Yoruichi went to borrow clothes from Sung-Sun, he passed time by engaging in a conversation with the yandere living rent-free in his head. He weighed the pros and cons of training in Urahara’s basement and Visored’s base with Nami. The thought of exposing his Zanpakutō to Kisuke unsettled him; he knew the mischievous scientist would brainstorm ideas to neutralize his shield in his pastime.

{Yet you asked Yoruichi to test your Zanpakutō.}

‘She won’t reveal it if I ask her.’

Despite being a lazy cat, her most admirable quality was her loyalty.

{That’s true. Then the Visored base is our best bet.}

‘I’ll ask Lisa to send everyone out. She won’t say no to her future husband.’

{Just promise her a stack of new erotica to make her agree. I’ll write her the erotica about the Hollow Prince and an exiled Shinigami Vice Captain.}

‘The similarities between us and your characters are just a coincidence, right? Right? Right?’

{My work may take inspiration from the real world but everything will be fiction!}

He rang Lisa's contact on the landline, the static reminding him that he held what would be considered a relic in his timeline. She willingly complied with his request, not asking for anything in return. With the sacrifice he was making for the Soul Society in mind, she must have perceived this as an opportunity to give back in some way.

Yoruichi returned not long after and knocked on the door. “Let’s go, Kazuya. I’m ready.”

As the door opened, Yoruichi came into view. She was standing with one knee on the floor, her hand raised in a mock salute. The sight of her took him aback; she wore a red military uniform complete with golden tassels and accents and white trousers tucked into black knee-high boots. He immediately recognized the look as being inspired by 19th Century British Redcoats.

She leaned in and reached out her hand, imitating the classic act of requesting a lady’s hand to bring it to her lips for a kiss. “Let us depart, My Prince.”

Soi Fon would have suffered a nosebleed and then fainted from happiness just by glimpsing at her beloved Yoruichi in this attire. Yoruichi exuded such strong authority and confidence that most women would find her tempting. Only god knew what it would do to the fanatic Soi Fon.

He smiled and placed his hand on hers. “I feel like a princess, though.”

She chuckled and rose to her feet, still holding his hand. “How do you like my new outfit? I thought it looked sick.”

Just like her nudity, her old-fashioned attire was just a ploy to get a reaction out of Kazuya. Given his smile and the admiration in his eyes, she had succeeded splendidly in her goal. His reaction gave her a new perspective on things he liked.

'He likes being spoiled.'

Kazuya nodded his head. “It looks regal, but why is my wife keeping it in her wardrobe?”

{Sung-Sun’s fashion sense is unrivaled. Being a horny pervert, she must have realized the potential of ‘cosplaying’ to please you. Such a sweet little minx.}

“Hell if I know.” Yoruichi grinned and led him down the stairs by his hand. “Follow me, My Prince. I’ll escort you safely.”