Big Life

“What is she talking bout?” Oh Myung-Suk asked, fixing his glasses.

Chae Yoo-Jin slowly pulled her phone away from her ears, looking at him tearfully.

“Father suddenly…”

“Give me the phone. Hello? Mother?”

— Myung-Suk? Myung-Suk, what should I do? My heart is pounding so much…!

“Please calm down first and tell me everything. You said father disappeared?”

— He went back to the study during lunch, and I haven’t heard from him since, so I went to knock on the door because I was getting too worried, but I didn’t get a response at all. I then went in and saw a letter left on… Sobbb…!

“Please calm down, mother. I’ll go back home right now.”

Meanwhile, Chae Yoo-Jin had already picked up their coats and bags, getting ready to leave. They left the sky lounge in a hurry, with the food on the table still untouched.

“Myung-Suk!” Oh Myung-Suk’s stepmother ran to him with her tear-stained face.

Oh Myung-Suk had driven down like the wind and hugged her. As she shook in his arms, he rubbed her back to console her.

“It’s going to be alright, Mother. It’s going to be fine. Where is the letter?”

“It’s in the study… I didn’t touch it… Sobbb…”

Chae Yoo-Jin went to the study and brought out the letter. Oh Myung-Suk stood at the same spot, opening the letter. He recognized his father’s penmanship right away. He had written with so much force that some parts of the paper were torn.

- To my dear son, Oh Myung-Suk

I didn’t want to worry my family at this age, but there's no other way. I need some time to be alone and to reflect on my life quietly. I’ll be back as soon as I can, so please understand and don’t come looking for me.

“…!” Oh Myung-Suk's hands trembled visibly. His self-reproach spilled out uncontrollably through his hot breaths. Oh Myung-Suk then took off his glasses, which were misting over from the tears.

“Myung-Suk…! If anything goes wrong with your Father, then I…!”

“Nothing bad will happen, Mother!” Oh Myung-Suk roared.

His stepmother clamped her mouth shut in shock, as it was the first time Oh Myung-Suk had ever raised his voice at her.

Oh Myung-Suk turned around and pulled out his phone. Where exactly did his father go? Oh Myung-Suk felt frustrated, as there wasn’t a place that came to his mind.

***

“How long has it been, Soo-Hee? I almost forgot what you looked like.”

”Stop with all the fuss, girl. It’s only been a few months.”

“Your ice-cold princess personality is still the same, even after you got married. Plus, a few months is still quite a long time, alright? Shall we only meet once a year in the future during our alumni gathering then?”

”You’re being a bitch again. Alright, I missed you a lot, my dear Hyo-Jin. It’s beeeeen so long.”

“I don’t need your empty words. It’s not like I’m accepting a bow from you.” Cheon Hyo-Jin pouted, turning away.

However, Lee Soo-Hee pulled her into a hug, tickling her. Cheon Hyo-Jin couldn’t even last a few seconds before she burst out laughing.

“There have been a few good restaurants popping up recently. They even have playrooms and nursing rooms.”

“I know, right? I looked them up because of Eun-Chae and found a place like this. It’s great to be able to bring babies along here.”

Lee Soo-Hee and Cheon Hyo-Jin sat down at a table in a spacious Korean restaurant they had agreed to meet at. The two women began reminiscing about their university days in an instant.

“I’d have thought you were a virgin if it hadn't been for Eun-Chae.” Watching Lee Soo-Hee carrying Eun-Chae in her arms, Cheon Hyo-Jin added, “But you still look the same after having Eun-Chae. You just look like an eldest sister taking care of her youngest sister, or maybe even a babysitter.”

“Why don’t you call me her eldest sister instead of a babysitter?”

“Look at you, not even trying to deny it. Only I know about that princess disease of yours. Give Eun-Chae to me. I want to carry her, too.”

Eun-Chae giggled as Cheon Hyo-Jin carried her and rubbed noses with Eun-Chae.

Cheon Hyo-Jin then asked, “When are you going to have a second child?”

”Why are you already talking about a second child?”

“Is Jae-Gun not pushing for it?”

“Yeah, he's not.”

“Really?”

“He would have been pushing for a second one if our first child were a boy. He wanted a girl so badly before labor, and his wish had come true. He even said that he wouldn’t wish for anything else as long as there is Eun-Chae.”

Lee Soo-Hee took a bite of her short-rib patty before asking, “Is there any news between you and Jung-Jin?”

“We’re going to think it over after Jung-Jin’s current project. He’s been working so hard working on the game development this time, saying that he wants to let me live a good life.”

“Look, I did say he’s the kind to do it once he has set his mind to it, right?”

Cheon Hyo-Jin sighed, her shoulders drooping. “But I think he's been receiving a lot of stress from work...”

“Why?”

“He becomes a beast once night falls. He goes all out until daybreak, but I can’t complain much because… Hey, stop laughing. Jung-Jin is quite good at it.”

“Hyo-Jin, you…” Lee Soo-Hee flushed, looking around their surroundings.

Thankfully, no one seemed to have heard their conversation, but Cheon Hyo-Jin still continued. “We've been using contraceptives, but I had no idea that they were that expensive. Why are they so expensive? Jung-Jin purchased them in bulk, so it was slightly cheaper.”

“Madam Cheon Hyo-Jin, shouldn't we stop talking about that?”

“Right. Come to think of it, we might have kids unexpectedly since we’re a couple now. We’d randomly say it’s better not to have kids while we’re drinking sometimes, but I can’t help myself when I get tipsy—Eup!”

Lee Soo-Hee stuffed a piece of the short-ribs patty into Cheon Hyo-Jin’s mouth, shutting her up.

Cheon Hyo-Jin flushed when she noticed a neighboring table covering their teeth, suppressing their laughter. Thankfully, they seemed to be of their mother’s age, so Lee Soo-Hee felt relieved.

“Please lower your volume.”

“Was I that loud?”

“I could probably hear you all the way from Busan. How can you become so crude after getting married…”

“It’s you who’s weird; you haven't changed at all.”

Just as they were bickering,

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but…” A couple, seemingly in their twenties, approached the ladies with awkward looks.

Flustered, Lee Soo-Hee straightened up and said, “I’m sorry that we were quite noisy earlier. We’ll be careful.”

“What? No, it’s not that…” the man stuttered.

His partner spoke up instead, “You must have Writer Ha Jae-Gun’s wife, right?”

“Ah, yes… I am.”

“And she is Eun-Chae? She’s so pretty. I’m a huge fan of Writer Ha Jae-Gun. We started dating because of his autograph event, too.”

“Oh my, really? He’d be so happy to hear that he’s done something much more worthwhile than writing novels if I told him about this.”

Cheon Hyo-Jin took the phone and helped them to take a photo together. The couple greeted them and then left happily. Cheon Hyo-Jin watched the couple leave and naturally asked about Ha Jae-Gun, “Jung-Jin couldn’t come because of work, but I wish Jae-Gun were here with us.”

“Yeah, I agree…”

“Is Jae-Gun still as busy as ever? Still busy writing day in and day out that he couldn’t even come out to have a meal with us?”

Lee Soo-Hee responded with a bitter smile. Ha Jae-Gun was indeed busy, but Lee Soo-Hee hadn't been able to figure out why he was so busy.

‘Where is he off to today…?’

In fact, Ha Jae-Gun had been going out more often lately. He would leave the house early in the morning and would mostly return only once it was midnight. He had even stayed outside three days ago, saying that he would be working overnight at the writer’s office.

Lee Soo-Hee had always put Ha Jae-Gun as her first priority, so she tried her best to understand him. However, they were still newlyweds, and she was upset to see how much he was staying out.

“What are you thinking about so seriously?”

“Hmm? It’s nothing. Let’s eat; the food is turning cold.”

Lee Soo-Hee’s phone rang the moment she picked up the chopsticks. Lee Soo-Hee answered the call immediately after seeing the name Jang Eun-Young appear on the screen.

“Hello, Writer Jang.”

— Hohoho, how have you been, madam? The writers at the office have pooled money together to buy Eun-Chae a present, but we’re having a disagreement over whether to send it to you personally or through a courier.

“You guys didn’t have to do that. Feel free to come over to visit whenever, though. I’ll prepare a nice dinner for you guys. You don’t have to bring any gifts. How are the writers doing?”

— Everyone is excited. Min-Ho and Hyun-Kyung are excited about their new novel, and Yeon-Woo has been giving so many lectures that we hardly see him around in the office anymore. And our youngest, Writer Bong-Yi, you know her, right? Hyun-Kyung and Bong-Yi just started dating too. I can’t stand the sight of them at alI. I can’t concentrate on my work, and it's all their fault.

Lee Soo-Hee chuckled. She could picture the cozy scene of the writer’s office with Jang Eun-Young’s description. She felt boundlessly happy to see that there were so many nice people around him.

As her laughter calmed down, Lee Soo-Hee said, “I should have followed my husband to the office when he left the day before. I wouldn't have been able to stay up together, but I could have bought you guys supper.”

— Sorry, but the day before?

”Oh my, were you not around in the office three days ago? My husband left for the writer’s office and stayed up the entire night there.”

— Oh? I have been staying at the writer’s office for two whole weeks because of the deadline for the adult piece I’m working on. It was around three days ago, too, but Writer Ha didn't come to the office.

“…?”

— That’s strange. Did he drop by for a while during the day? I don’t work round the clock since I'm used to taking afternoon naps.

Lee Soo-Hee looked down in shock. Was she ever such a weak-hearted woman who only relied on her husband? Her heart pounded even when she told herself that it was nothing to worry about.

— Hello? Madam? Madam?

Lee Soo-Hee did not have the energy to reply. She had just realized that her husband had the ability to lie, and that thought alone made her afraid as tears welled up in her eyes.

***

[Celebrity Chae Bo-Ra, who was jailed for the sponsor blackmailing case, is now under investigation for allegedly instigating the assault of her manager. It happened just two months after her return as a panelist on an adult variety show on a certain cable broadcast. The netizens’ disappointed reactions…]

[News of movie director Woo Jae-Hoon being sued for fraud was belatedly revealed, shocking many. Investors had funded around 2 billion Korean won to his latest movie, titled To Die or Live. It was revealed that not a single penny was returned to them…]

Clack.

Oh Tae-Jin turned off the radio and took off the earphones. He had turned it on, hoping to rid of the complicated thoughts in his mind, but he only felt worse.

‘Only an hour more to go…’ Oh Tae-Jin was currently on a train heading toward Pohang.

The old train was rattling away but was going steadfastly on the tracks. Oh Tae-Jin drew the stained curtains and peered out the window. The raindrops were slowly falling on the window pane.

- I thought you would come and look for me once. I’m not upset; just saying it out loud. I hope we can go there even just once, sit in the gazebo, and have a watermelon together. Madam talked about you quite often as well.

The words his friend said before getting into a hit-and-run accident rang in Oh Tae-Jin’s ears. He was heading over there, which his friend had spoken of.

Oh Tae-Jin was the only person in this world who knew where it was located. After picking up what regrettable courage he had to go on the journey to chase after his friend's traces, Oh Tae-Jin felt nothing but pain and loneliness.

Oh Tae-Jin opened his bag and pulled a stack of papers that had crumpled but had been clipped together. The stack of papers had crumpled due to the strength he'd instinctively put in his hands whenever his emotions got the better of him.

[Self-Assembled Milky Way, 8th revision]

T’s feedback: It was a blessing to be a part of the process of building the five boys’ dreams

G’s reply: I wonder where your emotions are coming from. They resonate deeply with the friendship throughout the rainy dawn

[Childhood Memories, 12th revision]

T’s feedback: If there weren't a glimmer of hope at the end of solitude, I would have definitely corrected it before you could have done anything

G’s reply: You were by my side like a shadow while I walked on this lonely path, albeit not alone.

[Great Life, Incomplete manuscript]

T’s feedback: I would like to share your darkness

G’s reply: To my forever friend, T

Oh Tae-Jin stuffed the crumpled stack of papers to the bottom of his bag. Despite reading it countless times, he still couldn’t pull his emotions together. Oh Tae-Jin knew that the memo written by T in each novel was referring to himself. Oh Tae-Jin would always be the first person to read his friend’s works and give out feedback.

The number of people that his friend had shown his works toward were limited, and those people disappeared slowly after his friend was abandoned by his own mentor.

And absurdly, his last remaining reader was the person who had transformed his friend’s work into his own.

‘Don’t resent me too much, my friend.’ Of course, Oh Tae-Jin wasn’t expecting a reply. He closed his eyes, slowly letting out a sigh.

***

“No, you must feel uncomfortable staying at such an old inn.”

”I’m not trying to stay. Perhaps…” Oh Tae-Jin trailed off as he scanned the landlord’s face. Her wrinkled face did not cover the person he had recognized from his memories. The face of a nice lady he had seen a long time ago had superimposed over hers.

“Why are you staring at me?”

“No, I just…” Oh Tae-Jin cleared his throat, cutting off the conversation temporarily. He had decided to bury the fact that he had stayed here long-term with his friend before, a long time ago.

“My friend said he had left some stuff here…”

“Hmm? Left stuff here? Who is it?”

“Um… He’s called Seo Gun-Woo; he must have been writing while he stayed here.”

There was no need for further explanation. The old lady tilted her head, looking closely at Oh Tae-Jin’s face before suddenly asking, “Are you Oh Tae-Jin?”

“Ah…”

”I’m right, right? Yes, I think it was 1974 or 1975. Both you and Gun-Woo stayed here for a long time.”

“That’s right… You still remember.”

Oh Tae-Jin felt more perplexed than glad in the current situation.

Regardless, the old lady grabbed Oh Tae-Jin's hands and welcomed him. “You’re so mean. You should have said goodbye before leaving. I remember it all now. You even paid for all of our watermelons, saying that our watermelons are the best.”

“Yeah, I did. It was the best I've ever had. I'm glad to see you still so healthy after all these years.”

The old lady wasn't aware of Oh Tae-Jin’s other identity: the former chairman of Korea’s largest publishing company. The old lady treated Oh Tae-Jin like the old university student whom she had met a long time ago and smiled brightly, saying, “Gun-Woo didn't talk much about you. He went back to Seoul, and I haven't heard from him since then. So, is he still doing well?”

“Um… yes, he is.”

“If so, why are you here alone?”

“He has been busy recently… I needed to run an errand in Pohang, so he asked me to pick up the stuff he had left behind as well.”

The old lady nodded with a disapproving look. Oh Tae-Jin told the lie, afraid that she would be shocked by the saddening news. He decided to remain silent and ended the topic there.

“There's nothing much he had left behind. I felt safe leaving Gun-Woo's luggage here, which made me feel like he was still with me. Come here. Gun-Woo's room is left as it was, so go ahead and stay overnight.”

“Yes, Madam.”

Oh Tae-Jin was led to a small room, where he stood in the middle of it alone. The colored wallpaper, tattered flooring, and dust-covered porch light filled his view. Soon, the old lady returned, struggling with a small bag in hand.

“Please give it to me. You should have asked me to help you.”

“It's not that heavy; I'm just too old now. You can unpack and come out for lunch in a while.”

“Thank you.”

Left all alone, Oh Tae-Jin sat down and opened his friend’s bag. The bag contained some necessities and a few old books and notes. The first thing he saw was a journal, which he reached out to pick up.

After flipping through a few pages of it, a teardrop fell on a page of the journal, wetting it. The part where it fell was where T appeared. On the next page and the following page—T was still there. T was on the last page as well.

“I'm sorry…!” Oh Tae-Jin hugged the journal tight and bent forward. The only person who could hear him gasping for air would be the old lady, who was in the midst of washing rice. Having learned to gauge the burden in the hearts of her guests, the old lady did not probe; she didn’t ask about Oh Tae-Jin’s next destination as well.

***

“I knew you'd come here.”

It was deep in the night, where the moonlight illuminated the world. A man’s voice was heard from behind the grave. Oh Tae-Jin felt strange but was not surprised. He just couldn’t pull out his hands and shuddered in fear.

“That’s why I’ve been waiting for you.”

“Why did you wait for me?”

“Is this the best you can do right now?”

“Don’t stop me.”

The other party took a step forward to the grave. The street lamp added more light at his feet. The light allowed Oh Tae-Jin to see Ha Jae-Gun’s face and the haggard, scraggly beard covering his chin.